Endorsement: Outdoor Showers
BY JOEY SWEENEY | I’m about halfway through a noble and wonderful experiment: What can two weeks of outdoor showers do for a person? That’s the experiment. The conditions? Nothing but outdoor showers, preferably just before dusk. The control? There is no control, man, I’m just listening to a lotta Jerry I guess.
Though outdoor showers have been around literally since the day a caveperson wandered into the spray of a waterfall, I have come to them late in life due to excessive city living, Catholicism, and… yeesh, we could be here all day. Let’s just say I’m new to my body. However, in recent years, I’ve come to admire a very specific sort of outdoor shower. It’s gotta be by the beach or a lake, and off of the back of a house that is nice enough to crash out in, but not too too nice because if I don’t wanna live in a Toll Brothers house in the city you can be damned sure I don’t wanna vacation in one, either. The house should allow for enough space that you do not feel super-compelled to make sure you are completely free and clear of sand on your person before you walk back in.
More about the shower apparatus itself: Make it as jerry-rigged as possible, please, and add extra personality. The one I’m writing this in right now (fetch me a beer?) is like a little wooden outhouse painted pale yellow, has an old “Earth”-inspired shower curtain on one side (bless its heart), and someone has strewn old fishing nets about to give it a nautical feel which I appreciate. The garden-hose style faucets look like they’re from the era of AM radio, thank you, and they’re configured in the old fashion: One for hot, one for cold. Please handle them with care, as they, the pipes they’re configured on, the shower head, this whole operation looks like you could rip it right out of the ground if you pulled on them too hard.
But don’t confuse its delicacy for weakness: This shorehouse bunkhouse shower is a shabby Cadillac, because it even has one of those lil’ anterooms that you can dry off and get un/dressed in and not have all your business out. Better still, it has mystery shampoo, conditioner and a wild looking bar of soap that you can just roll the dice on! If all of the above conditions are observed, when it’s all happening, one should experience a symphony of running water, late afternoon sunshine, and bath product happy accidents.
As far as the experiment goes, here’s what I can tell you: So far, so good. Try it. You’re gonna feel like a million bucks. Outdoor showers. Who knew!
